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Mariemont Players, Inc. is pleased to announce auditions for our January (2024) production, Rumors by Neil Simon, directed by Ed Cohen.

Audition dates/times:

Saturday, July 15 at 2:00 p.m.

Sunday, July 16 at 6:30 p.m.


Performance Dates: January 11 - 28, 2024

Location: Mariemont Players, 4101 Walton Creek Road, Cincinnati, Ohio 45227


Audition Requirements:

  • Auditions will consist of cold readings from the script.

  • Please bring a resume and headshot.


The production team encourages actors of all races, ethnicities, identities, abilities, experience levels, etc. to audition – all are welcome!


Please contact the director at with questions.



At a large, tastefully-appointed Sneden’s Landing townhouse, the Deputy Mayor of New York has just shot himself. Though it’s only a flesh wound, Charlie Brock’s self-inflicted injury sets off a series of events causing four couples to experience a severe attack of farce.

As their tenth wedding anniversary commences, Charlie lies bleeding in another room, and his wife Myra is nowhere in sight. The first guests, lawyer Ken Gorman and his wife Chris, scramble to get “the story” straight before the other guests arrive. As the confusions and miscommunications mount, the evening spins off into classic farcical hilarity.


Character Descriptions:

  • KEN GORMAN – A well-to-do lawyer. Wealthy, but by no means pretentious. Takes charge of the situation. Married to Chris. Halfway through the show, a gunshot causes his temporary deafness. 

  • CHRIS GORMAN – Another lawyer, married to Ken. Beautiful, easily flustered. Frantically tries to maintain normalcy at the party. Has recently quit smoking, which drives her to drink a bit more. 

  • LENNY GANZ – A wealthy accountant, distraught over the recent destruction of his new car. Starts the show with an extreme case of whiplash. Intolerant of the gossipy lifestyle that he is often involved in. 

  • CLAIRE GANZ – Lenny’s wife. Very concerned with appearances (hers and others’). Starts the play with a swollen lip. Likes to gossip. 

  • ERNIE CUSACK – A psychiatrist. Affable, smokes a pipe. Loves his wife very much. Tries to be as helpful as possible cooking the evening’s dinner. 

  • COOKIE CUSACK – Has her own cooking show. Suffers from extreme back spasms. Loves her husband very much. A bit absent-minded at times. 

  • GLENN COOPER – A handsome man running for State Senate. Worried about his own reputation. Struggles with placating his wife, who is convinced he is having an affair (which he may or may not be). 

  • CASSIE COOPER – Glenn’s beautiful wife. Obsesses over her husband's relationships with other women. Quick to anger. Must rub her quartz crystal to calm herself down. 

  • OFFICER WELCH – A city police officer having a rough night. Does not tolerate lying. Sees through the “classy” façade that these high-society types put up. 

  • OFFICER PUDNEY – Welch’s partner, a younger police officer. A strong but silent type.


Production Dates: January 11 - 28, 2024

Thursday, January 11 - 7:30PM

Friday, January 12 - 7:30PM

Saturday, January 13 - 7:30PM

Sunday, January 14 - 2:00PM (matinee)

Thursday, January 18 - 7:30PM

Friday, January 19 - 7:30PM

Saturday, January 20 - 2:00PM (matinee)

Saturday, January 20 - 7:30PM

Sunday, January 21 - 2:00PM (matinee)

Thursday, January 25 - 7:30PM

Friday, January 26 - 7:30PM

Saturday, January 27 - 7:30PM

Sunday, January 28 - 2:00PM (matinee)

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